For many, spring represents the perfect time to get physically re-organized. Others still see it as the perfect time to get married and otherwise “let their love bloom.” I have a different take on the concept of spring cleaning.
Anyone who has followed the last few posts of mine will have already gathered that I am quite heavily burdened by the fallout of a romantic relationship, one that came close at one point to bringing about marriage and possibly children. It is represented in my mind’s eye not unlike a cluttered closet that I just keep cramming junk into, hoping that it won’t one day burst at the seams and overflow.
Now, I am actually a big fan of winter, in fact it is my favorite season. I love the snow, the ice, and colder temperatures. I’d say that it comes quite naturally with having an ancestral line that hails from the British Isles, Germania, and Scandinavia. That being said, experiencing this sudden dose of warm, pleasant weather in my hemisphere has awakened not only the seemingly innate sense of “this is the time clean your home, your car, etc.,” but it has also instilled in me a motivation to finally clean out the dusty closet in my mind, something that I keep trying to avoid.
Instead of wasting time trying to replace the relationship’s presence in my life, both physically and emotionally, I am going to focus on what makes me happy, and what will better my aspirations. Playing video games, connecting with nature (as contradictory as those two sound, I know), focusing on my music, and of course, writing blogs such as these, makes me happy. It is time for me to stop reacting to my situation and to start being proactive. Reacting out of impulse and hurt is extremely destructive, and especially as someone like me, an introvert who draws strength from within and not from outside sources, harboring self-destructive thoughts is especially crippling.
I will continue to “clean” my mental “closet” here in this blog, whether it be through more basic writings such as these, or lyrics, poetry, or even reviews of music and other things that I love. I sincerely thank every and anyone who has been reading thus far, and continues to do so.